Monday, April 9, 2007

If only I liked tomatoes...


If only I liked tomatoes, I could probably turn this photograph of these beautiful red tomatoes into a wonderfully witty and heartwarming essay about the coming of spring, and the bounty of the earth, and blah blah blah.

Unfortunately, I hate raw tomatoes almost as much as I hate liver, and quite a bit more than I hate brussel sprouts. I don't mind them cooked into sauces, as long as they're highly seasoned, and I can choke down the occasional stewed tomato if it presents in a dish, but raw tomatoes no. Not now. Not ever. Not even a single bite. I don't even like cutting them. I can't possibly wax poetic about a bowl of fresh tomatoes. Don't get me wrong, I'll certainly enjoy the 73,386 gallons of homemade tomato sauce that my husband is preparing this evening to restock our freezer, but that is because once they are cooked they lose their resemblance to their hated and feared predecessor. I think George Carlin had it right with an old skit of his - in a peculiar eery voice he intoned "they're not finished yet, they're still in the larval stage." And they really are too, when you think about it, all slippery and slimy inside, not to mention that strange raw taste *shudder*.

Still, it's a nice picture, isn't it?

10 comments:

SusieJ said...

I LOVE tomatoes. And, I can't grow fresh ones, because my boys pick them when they're green and use them as torpedoes! But, your imagery here, in this post is beautiful.

scribbit said...

Larval stage--ha!

I felt the same way (and still do slightly) but can now eat them mixed in with other things, like on hamburgers or in tacos or salads.

But I once threw up at the dinner table trying to gag down a raw tomato. My grandmother grows these beautiful, giant beefsteak tomatoes and they looked so pretty I thought surely I'd got over my repugnance and could eat one raw, but then one taste and I remembered that a tomato is still a tomato. Even a pretty one.

Kim said...

I love tomatoes! Put a little salt on them and they are divine. Homegrown tomatoes are the BEST!

This Eclectic Life said...

There's no accounting for taste. Personally I love tomatoes, but I don't have any prejudice against those who don't---it leaves more for me! It was a nice rant, though! I love a good rant.

darcy said...

I would eat nothing but raw 'maters everyday of my life if I could (OK-maybe not) but still, I love them. I love to grow them and smell them and I love the earthy smell and it's truly our gift, the bounty of the earth and-KIDDING! But I do love them.

Janice said...

I am a tomato lover. I am also raising two little tomato lovers who eat raw tomatoes like candy!

I am a tomato snob though. I had the very best growing-up in Southern Cal. eating them fresh off the vine. Hard to be satisfied after that.

Lady G~ said...

LOL! My oldest doesn't like tomatoes either. I do like to cook with tomatoes though. I have to be in the mood to eat them in a salad or raw. But this sure is a nice picture.

Fairly Odd Mother said...

You sound like my husband! He can handle tomato sauce (smooth, not chunky) and salsa (even my homemade kind) but NOT 'real' tomatoes. I, on the other hand, love them when they are fresh, mostly on sandwiches. Beautiful photo---makes me feel all summery inside.

Janet said...

ROFLMAO! I can think of nothing better than a dinner of liver, brussels spouts, and sliced fresh tomatoes for dessert :-)

Melissa R. Garrett said...

Oh this is so funny to me! I have a good friend who also hates raw tomatoes. I just can't fathom it!