Sunday, February 10, 2008

Nearing Seven

I still find it hard to believe, but I have been on this mothering journey for nearly seven years. Seven years exactly come 4:15pm on Wednesday. After all these years, and despite this having been a very much planned, hoped for and wanted pregnancy, I still wake up sometimes marvelling at how my life has changed. How my family has changed. How that tiny little baby with the matchstick fingers has grown into a real boy. A sports-obsessed boy who's not half-bad with a soccer ball (where did he get that, certainly not from his parents...). How he's been joined by a sister who loves singing and dancing and Dora and Mickey Mouse. And ice cream. They both love ice cream. (So does their mother for that matter.)

My life has changed so much since he arrived in our lives, but I think that inside I have changed even more. I can barely remember what life was like before (though I do have vague recollections of being more rested and less sticky). I am more patient (most of the time) than I would have ever dreamed possible. I get more pleasure out of shopping for my children than I do out of shopping for myself. (Though I think all that extra weight they helped pack on me may account for that - why can't there be some way to preserve the beautiful inner changes without all the not so beautiful external ones?). I know what unconditional love is, and I know about raw fear. I can spend hours poring over birthday cake pictures or choosing the perfect party favor just to put a smile on my child's face as he proudly hands them out at school, even though I know that the silly little favor from the dollar store will be all but forgotten in a day or two.

I've learned that I can be soft, and that I can be hard. I learned that these mothering instincts extend to the children of strangers as well when I ran in to swoop an unsuspecting toddler out of the way of a high flying swing while his babysitter chatted on her cellphone without a care in the world (note to self: do not hire this babysitter). I've learned to be more giving and less selfish. I've learned the importance of setting boundaries, and the importance of allowing those boundaries to bend when understanding is what's needed. I've learned that no two days will ever be the same. Never the same, and never predictable. My world has changed, and I have changed with it.

Into a mother.

And I thank my lucky stars for that every single day.



The Writers Island prompt for this week is changed.

28 comments:

Fairly Odd Mother said...

My oldest just turned 7 and I hear you on all of this. It's hard to remember life without them.

Lisa Lou Hoo said...

Beautiful post. It is amazing how we grow as they do. My kids teach me so much about life!

Terri said...

Yup, Ronni will be 7 next month and I was just thinking about this the other day when talking to my sister after she had her baby. I'm a Mom! I can't remember NOT being a Mom.

Anonymous said...

Nip on over and collect your award dearie.

Robin said...

Really? Moi?

*dashing off*

Carol Anne said...

Beautifully written, Robin. I wanted to write something like this last month when my oldest turned 7, but just couldn't articulate it this well. Thank you!

Irene said...

What a great post. I often have those moments when I look around and am in awe at how much my life has changed. It has almost been a complete 180. I also sometimes catch myself in shock at how much love I feel for my kids. It almost is scary.

I always think I need to sit down and blog about that.

rebecca said...

i remember my daughter's first few months and how i asked myself the same question time and time again: how did i ever live without her for so long and thought i was happy? once she was born my previous, single life no longer mattered, i did not miss it, and i found for the first time in my life what true love was.

yes, the things we learn from our children, one of them being the instant unconditional, bonding love.

Lea said...

And seven seems to be one of those numbers of age where life does really change... no longer little boy, but moving out into the world in all new ways... and you as mom, it is life changing for you... bravo Robin!!! Remember when you were seven? And look at you now!!!!

b+ (Retire In Style Blog) said...

Beautifully written. Thank you so much.

b

Anonymous said...

As amazing as it is to watch our children grow, all the more amazing to watch grandchildren grow.I have been blessed with both.

Shannon said...

Beautiful Robin! It is amazing how those little balls of flesh end up turning our live into something unrecongnizable to our former selves. Wouldn't change a moment! Have a happy seventh!

Anonymous said...

Oh, sweet friend. As always, you have succinctly summed up the topic. My oldest is twenty-seven, and my "baby" is twenty-five. There are many more changes in store for you. Hold on to that patience!

Robin M said...

Great Post, Robin.

Children do have a way of changing your life. Mine is 8 now and ever changing, growing, arguing, etc.

thanks for visiting my blog. :)

the other Robin

Anonymous said...

I absolutely agree. Motherhood changes our lives forever and it helps us become better persons. Less of us, more of them ideal sets in everytime no matter the kid's age.

Julia Phillips Smith said...

A beautiful post, Robin. I really loved this:

'I do have vague recollections of being more rested and less sticky'

and this:

'I've learned that I can be soft, and that I can be hard.'

Lilight said...

That is certainly all so true, isn't it? Well put, Robin.

Anonymous said...

Mazeltov.

Rambler said...

you have written about one thing which a guy will never get to experience, but i am sure it would be a big change for both the parents.
Amazing emotion - motherhood

anthonynorth said...

Very well put. Speaking as a father of seven children - well, all but one are grown up now - I think it's true that changes are within as well as the actual circumstances.
I remember the point at which I first became a father, and thinking, everything has changed now - for the first time in my life, I realised I had REAL responsbilities.
I think I grew up in that moment.

Claremont First Ward said...

Oh, what a beautiful post. I've changed so much since becoming a mother too, and I'm so thankful for it.......there's nothing more rewarding. Nothing.

Anonymous said...

Nothing is as rewarding as motherhood.

This, from someone who is single and has no children! Yeah..me..

endless possibilities

Jody said...

Yes. Isn't it amazing how a child can change our lives.

My oldest is 13 and my youngest (of 4) is turning 4, and I just can't imagine my life without them.

Lovely post.

Anonymous said...

Lovely post, Robin, lovely. Hippy, hoppy, happy birthday to Itai for tomorrow (13th tomorrow right?).....I'll e him too.

Love,

Me
x

Robin said...

Yup, tomorrow. He's out of his skin with excitement :).

Anonymous said...

It was an aweful ,long time ago that mine were 7. But I do have a 7 year old grandson to keep me busy. Time flies so enjoy these early years while you can.

Anonymous said...

BEAUTIFUL post, Robin!!! There's a lot of truth in your words, and I think a lot of parents will relate. Many blessings to your little man, and congrats to you and Jay!

Fourier Analyst said...

Too bad we can't change everyone in the world this way. I do believe that if men could get this same kind of "internal makeover" that comes with motherhood, there would be no wars. Fatherhood doesn't quite have the same effect.